The longest yard..

Outerlim87 wrote:

I am madly in love with my boyfriend, who I've known for almost three years. We've had problems lately because I moved about 5 hours away for an awesome career in the medical field, while he finishes school. What are your pieces of wisdom for those in a long distance relationship? How do we make this work?

Outerlim87


I've been in your shoes before. No, not working in the medical field. No..not being a woman. No...not dating a guy who lived 5 hours away. I've been in a couple of long distance relationships. the difference between you and I is that my LDR's always started out that way. You seem to be at an advantage here because you've known hi for three years before moving away.

In my opinion, LDRs fail for three reasons. Lack of communication, lack of seeing each other, lack of commitment.

1. Lack of communication- There is a saying that people seem to plaster all over their Facebook profiles. Due to a lack of time, I can't look up WHO said it, but it goes, "Always say I love you before you go to sleep." I feel that this is the most important type of communication you can have in an LDR. Feeling loved and trusted and making the other person feel the same way is step number one. Communication builds trust, and without communication, that bridge will begin to crumble.

2. Lack of seeing each other- Plan to see each other more than just once every few months, especially if you live close (within 8 hours). Take turns surprising each other and being romantic, just as you would in a "normal" relationship. It's the romance and the surprises that keep the "just phone calls" part of the LDR from becoming mundane.

3. Lack of commitment- If you aren't serious about your partner, don't enter into an LDR with them. It will only end badly. If you're serious about a future with them, be open and honest, and don't let yourself settle for a "proximity cheat". Stay out of situations that would arouse negativity with your partner, and don't put yourself in situations that will cause you to make bad decisions.

Good luck with this. It can often be a challenge, but if you are serious about this person, you will find a way to make it work out for you.

Sean