Lies from Tennessee.

Crystal in Tennessee wrote:

I have a problem that seems to get in the way of my everyday life. I tell lots of little lies. I always think it's for the best, but people eventually find out the truth and it comes back to haunt me! Sometimes I even lie to myself, even though I know I may be doing the wrong thing, I lie and say it is for the best. I don't know why I do this, but I assume that it is because I don't like stress or it may be because I put SO much stock into what people think of me. I don't know why, but I've always been that way. The lying has cost me a relationship with a great guy (he busted me on several lies)and it has begun to upset a few friends. It has become habit, and it's really hard to give up.. What do I do?
Crystal

Theresa:
Plain and simple, don't lie. Why people lie is a mystery to me. You
should examine why you feel the need to lie and then eliminate it.
Trust is a big issue in a relationship, and once it has been broken by
lying, it is really hard to rebuild. Your lies will dig you deeper
and deeper, especially when you lie to yourself.

Sean:
I agree with Theresa. I know a few people who lie to avoid drama and it always comes back on them. Sometimes, it is to make themselves look good, sometimes to avoid drama, and other times it is a lie to cover another lie. The point is, when you lie, you lie to yourself. You lose a piece of who you are and cover it up with this lie. It all keeps adding up until you aren't yourself anymore, you are just a manifestation of these lies. The best thing you can do in life is be honest and be yourself. If you take that away, you won't be happy in any relationship you make. I lost someone once that couldn't be honest about how she and I met. She lied to avoid drama, she lied to maintain a certain image, and she lied to herself. She lied because it was easier than dealing with reality. I never doubted her love for me, so I remained honest with myself and with her. By the end of our relationship, she'd actually convinced herself she didn't deserve a normal and healthy relationship. It was heartbreaking. Find a way to be honest with yourself and those around you. You deserve honesty and so do they.